Artspeak: culture sector's most wanted

Artspeak: culture sector's most wanted

Following Daniel Blight's plea to put an end to artspeak, help us collect some of the most confusing and complex lingo going

What are you saying? Help us find the good, the bad and the downright confusing in artspeak. Photograph: Sarah Lee for the Guardian

Daniel Blight wrote an excellent piece this week on how to write an artist statement, and the reasons why we need to drop the artspeak, the "preposterously complex, jargon-laden" descriptions associated with art. And it goes for more than just statements: what about performance programmes, promotional tweets, or the words that arts PRs sometimes use to drive us hacks up the wall?

Take this example, from Daniel's piece:

Combining radical notions of performativity and the body as liminal space, my practice interrogates the theoretical limitations of altermodernism. My work, which traverses disparate realms of object-making such as painting and performance, investigates the space between metabolism and metaphysics and the aporia inherent to such a discourse

Impressed? As some of you have told us, not at all – and never.

Of course, the vocabulary and sentiment of artspeak is not without its meaning (and place) but to engage wider audiences, don't we need to clear things up a little bit?

Well, in an effort to do just that, and inject a little bit of fun into your week, why not help us in collecting some of the most confusing, complex and inaccessible arts bumph about, as a lesson in what not to do the next time you decide to put pen on paper.

Instructions

Simply paste what you deem to be the worst offending words, sentences or paragraphs you've read into the form below, and we'll share with you the most popular (or should that be least popular?) next week.